Agnostic

Now I start to understand why my friend felt sad when her friend told her that she doubted the religion they've shared.

A few days ago, I met a friend and I heard before that he has changed, from a Christian to an agnostic.

At first, I heard of his talking and didn't feel anything because I've heard about his changing mind before. But later, when he started to talk about how he doubted the existence of the Lord, who has created him and given him so many countless blessings, I believe He does give each of us countless blessings, I started to feel sad. 

I didn't know why I suddenly started to cry when actually I wanted to tell him my idea about his opinion. I just felt that while I was talking, my tears were so eager to run down from my eyes.

Later did I figure out, that maybe it was like a feeling of hurt when you heard of someone didn't love his/her parents. Yes, when I associated the feeling I felt in that position, I start to understand the reason I cried for. I felt sorry that he didn't feel thankful and grateful for things he has received from Him. And I really wish to help him go back to this faithful path, although maybe he doesn't want my help.

Well, maybe all I can do is to pray to Him, hoping that He will touch my friend with His Holy Spirit and let him back to the right path once again. 


Let's just hope....

No Copyright Intended The Music belongs to its respectful Owner..

Refresh!

Now I understand why I keep feeling happier everytime I leave the church,

Because there, in the church, we are renewed again, like a stuck website, or an error computer, we need to be refreshed! :)

Keep your life refreshed every time and everywhere with your beloved friends! It surely works out! =D

An acknowledgement to The Corrs who has accompanied me with their song Would you be happier while I'm writing this.

It's not me, it is YOU

It is a vanity to consider an achievement as a result of our own effort.
As my friend mentioned before, "Less of me, and more of You."

Before this, I always think that many things have happened because of my effort, my luck, and many other things that I’ve done. But tonight, my teacher made me realized that I was wrong. You are The One who had arranged all of them! And now, after all these years, I just realized it, I mean really realize it and be so conscious about it! Didn’t it so very late?-stupid me!

"Why me?" I wonder, like many people wonder, "why you?" There are so many people that are more than me. More clever, more skilled, more experienced, more knowledge, and so many other things I lack of.
But He answered, “Because I have a plan that I want you to go through.”

Realizing each blessing, each grace, and unlimited mercy He has given and offered, I understand that I was very stupid those days to think that I experienced this wonderful life because of my ownself.
How could I doubt all His Mightiness and believe that many of these happen because of me myself?? How foolish I am to think so! I have heard that people said, “Lucky is not the thing behind a person’s success, but countless hardwork, effort, and diligence are.” And I did still believe so a moment ago, with of course an addition of some percent of God’s will. But now I understand, that God’s will is the only thing that matters.

From the beginning! Maybe since I was in the high school, or maybe earlier when I was in my junior high school, or maybe even since I was a 4-year-old kid. How high my pride is to say that I got all of these because of me myself??

From my childhood, He made me love dogs and other animals. He made me want to be a veterinarian, then He sent great biology teachers to make me love that subject the most. Next, He arranged things so that I could pursue my undergraduate study in a great university where I met those great professionals in wildlife and inspired by them. I also learned and felt interest in conservation genetics and applied for a scholarship to deepen the subject. And everything is in His guidance.

I remember to regard my friend was so fortunate to get a scholarship. And I felt that she must be so blessed to get it. And then, after I got mine, I just took it for granted, as if it is how it supposed to be. How can I be so forgetful? I forgot that He has arranged all of these for me. I forgot that He is The One who has given me this wonderful life. I should have been very grateful and thankful to him, every second and every minute of my life, for this life I live is not my own, it belongs to Him.

Be grateful, be thankful, for all matters He has given to you. No matter how it seems in the start. Because He always knows what the best for us.

Guide within Me

By Your Lantern, I will be brave to go through dark tunnels
By Your Guidance, I will be able to go through impossible things
I will be strong and audacious to follow the path You’ve shown me.
Amen.

Dear Noble Father,
I am so thankful and grateful for Your Invitation to let me joining Your Shelter.
Because by joining it, I get faith, trust, and a solid foundation to live a life.
You are my Guide, The Only One who knows the best for me. Without You, I may get lost in this complicated life and do not know which way I should take. But with You by my side, I am convinced that a certain decision is really the best for me.

Like Abraham, I do not know what I will face there in my future where You have assigned me. But I know that You will always there to guide and protect me from bad things, offer me great things, and plan the best for me. 

You have answered my prayer when You let him said yes to accept me as his follower. However, I don’t know why he never responses my further email after that. Maybe he is very busy. But, I don’t know. I just don’t really understand why he can’t reply-even very short reply-email of mine.

Maybe You have a different plan for me. The yes answer was to assign me to go there. But maybe You actually want me to work with another person. I don’t know. All I can do now, is only praying and hoping for the best….

Amen.